Day Three–Closets Create Space

Full disclosure. I did not venture into the closets today. My morning began in the usual fashion. I was almost finished with the edits that my fantastic proofreaders found in Saving Atlantis. I had to get it done. Then self-care could not be ignored, so I went to Lynn’s wonderful Baptiste class. I was with Karen, one of the proofreaders, and I had some questions about her comments. We discussed it over refreshments at Uncommon Grounds.

I came home, finished the edits. The 10th draft is looming over my head. Time to reread the manuscript. Then I filled out an application for the Albany Book Festival in September, which is important for my business.

By that time, Stephen came home, and we watched the end of the World Cup Soccer semi-finals. I won’t go into my disappointment that England lost.

I had promised Luke I would go on a date with him to a car show. We rode our motorcycles, talked to Camaro enthusiasts, and ate dinner. We saw our friend’s new motorcycle–Fat Bob and of course had to go over every detail! I walked the dogs and now it’s 9:30pm.

I thought about the closets and feel like they aren’t a high priority, but they are on the list. What to do? I could berate myself for falling off the create space wagon or I can give myself a break and start over tomorrow.

I still have editing to do and tomorrow is cleaning bathroom cabinets, indexing my journals, and transferring personal files to storage to create that essential space on my computer. I’m falling behind, but I did leave some time on Saturday to make up for whatever I didn’t get done.

Even though I didn’t do what was scheduled, I had a great day. I want to share a book I’m reading about having less to make room for what matters. It’s called The Year of Less by Cait Flanders. She doesn’t necessarily give you a guidebook on how to live with less and be happier. It’s more of a memoir on why she decided to put restrictions on her purchasing and how living simply helped her mentally and physically.

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I’m not quite finished, so the rest of the evening will be filled searching for inspiration in a book!

Baptiste Sisters—Gratitude Day 15

Sometimes we all need a little kick in the butt to get back on our path. Some days we need to be dragged. 

Karen, far right, did that almost three years ago to get me to a yoga class. I wish she had brought me sooner.

I have been struggling with a sinus infection for three weeks and haven’t made it to yoga. Once that happens it’s so hard to get back. 

Cara, pictured in the middle, is our Baptiste sister who trained with us. She came up for the weekend. She and Karen went to a 90 minute class yesterday. I wasn’t up for it and was bummed. 

This morning we planned to go. I woke up and told myself all the reasons of why I couldn’t go. But I knew since my sisters would be there, I needed to go. For the support, Community, and get me back on my path. 

They have been where I am, understand the hesitation, and know how to push me past my barriers. 

So thank you Cara and Karen. I am grateful to have you both in my life on and off the mat!

Face the Bear

A couple times this week, it was suggested to let the past go or drop what didn’t work for me and move forward. This is especially true with yoga. The first lesson we learn is that if you fall out of a pose, shake it off and get back into it.

This perspective has been a powerful tool for me. It makes life lighter if we can laugh at ourselves or shake off mishaps and mistakes. It keeps us present to what we are doing and what path we are following.

grizzly-bear2

But sometimes what’s behind us that we haven’t dealt with affects the path we are on. Sometimes we have to turn and face the bear that has been chasing us for a long time. I say bear only because if most of us saw a bear, we would probably run. However, if it’s literally a bear, the worse thing we can do is run. The bear will keep chasing us and possibly cause harm.

It may not be a bear, but your inner demons, grief, tragedy, pain, addiction, the list is endless. If we never face what is causing us to have to restart over and over again, then we can get stuck on our path.

So there needs to be a balance. I know grief will chase me my entire life. Turning around and acknowledging it took a long time for me. Doing that allowed me to move forward. I spent many years stuffing it down, and I still do when that bear gets too close. I tamp it down and run as hard as I can. So now my grief walks alongside me. It’s not something that will ever go away. It’s like a scar on my heart that out of the blue makes itself known. When I falter and have a day where I’m not as chipper as I usually am, or I can’t function, I’m kind to myself and let it be. I give myself permission to be with that grief, then I shake it off and move forward.

Life to me is in the moment, forward and backward. You can’t eliminate the past, but you can choose how you react to it. You can’t completely forget about the bear who is lumbering over you, but you also can’t let it prevent you from living.

Journaling is a way for me to revisit my past without allowing it to overwhelm me. And not everything in the past is bad, let’s be honest! How about turning and remembering the wonderful people and events in your life?! That propels you right past those demons.

Every new day is a chance to start over. Every moment is a chance to forgive ourselves and begin again.

What is chasing you? What stops you from moving forward? What would happen if you turned around and faced it and had a dialogue? How have you begun anew?

You never know, what you thought was chasing you may have only wanted to say hello.