My last post was about crossroads, winding paths, and the roadmap to your purpose. If you didn’t yet, write down what you are passionate about, what you love to do, what is important to you, what do you value, and list your positive characteristics–at least 5. Writing about ourselves can be the hardest thing to do. But when we know ourselves, we know our path.
Next, if you couldn’t fail, what would you do? This is scary, because we think failing is the worst thing we can do. If we fail, we are somehow less of a person. This fear becomes an obstacle, a big wall that we can’t get around. In his book, Let Me Out: Unlock your Creative Mind and Bring your Ideas to Life, Peter Himmelman introduces MARV (Majorly Afraid of Revealing Vulnerability).
He writes, “The fear that we feel when we try something new, something particularly challenging, isn’t some petty worry; it’s actually a mortal fear. . . . Marv isn’t trying to hurt us; he’s trying to save our skins.” (6)
Fear is a powerful enemy. But, the more we fail, the more we learn and grow. Easy to write that down, but hard to digest. We are afraid of being vulnerable and weak. It is practically wired in our DNA and forced on us by society.
It’s also our ego. In his book, Being of Power: The 9 Practices to Ignite an Empowered Life, Baron Baptiste’s second practice is Release the Concern for Looking Good. He writes, “For us, failure isn’t about an unachieved task, a relationship that didn’t work out, or a poorly taught or practiced yoga class. It’s about what it means to us if we’re considered a failure and how others see us.” (19)
I read this chapter the night before my third degree black belt test. I felt a lot of pressure to succeed and not embarrass anyone and myself. But after I read this chapter, I knew that my greatest gift was to be authentic and come from a place of power and confidence. Instead of doing my best, I was myself. I not only succeeded, I felt empowered. It was life changing, but then I forget and go back behind that wall of fear.
If I couldn’t fail, didn’t worry about what anyone thought, and was completely myself, I would write full-time to regularly publish my books and develop my writing classes into a program to help others find their voice and purpose. My purpose is to create an environment of hope and empowerment, to soften the harshness of reality, and to entertain with my words. I also want to provide the space and tools for others to follow their paths and live their purpose. When I think about this, I see it, I feel the joy and excitement, the authenticity of it all. But then that dang fear seeps in and makes me doubt myself. I fill my time with distractions and make excuses.
We spend our whole lives wishing and hoping for our dreams to come true. But what are we waiting for? Someone else to do it? That’s not going to happen! All we need is within us right now.
Once you know your purpose, what makes your spirit soar, call out that obstacle, that fear. Identify it. Stare it down.
Part of my fear is that people won’t like what I write. That’s my ego talking and not my spirit. If I write from my truth, my intuition, then the people who need the words will get it or hopefully be entertained.
My other obstacle is how I spend my time. I am not the best in organizing my time. It get distracted with the laundry, walking the dogs, etc. It’s the downside of working from home.
But it’s also the physical distractions. Yes, my office is in disarray once again. I run Nick’s Fight to be Healed Foundation that helps kids with cancer. Talk about having a dual purpose, although I see this more as a mission. The kids, teens, young adults, and their families could hugely benefit from what I want to share and teach. These purposes can co-exist. I only have to break down that wall.
I’m lucky I know my purpose. I have worked hard to figure it out through self-inquiry, journaling, and trial and error. Mostly, it’s my gut that tells me.
So what are you waiting for?
What is your purpose? Do the work, live your life fully and powerfully. Stand in your truth.
Break down your own obstacle, no matter what it is.
Then act on it. Tell someone, because once you send it out, the universe will help you.